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Hi Bob,

This is Alan next door.

I’m sorry buddy, but I have a confession to make.  I’ve been riddled with guilt these past few months and have been trying to pluck up the courage to tell you to your face but I am at least now telling in text as I can’t live with myself a moment longer without telling you.

The truth is, I have been sharing your wife, day and night when you’re not around.  In fact, probably more than you, particularly in the mornings after you’ve left for work.  I haven’t been getting it at home recently, but that’s no excuse I know.  I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest apologies.  My wife has known for some time now and I’ve promised her that it won’t happen again.

Sincerely
Alan

Bob felt betrayed, and in a fit of rage went into his bedroom, grabbed his gun, and without a word shot his wife and killed her.  He returned to the lounge where he poured himself a stiff drink and sat down on the sofa.  He took out his phone to respond to the neighbours text and saw he had another message:-

Hi Bob,

This is Alan next door again.  Sorry about the slight typo on my last text, I expect you worked it out anyway – my predictive text changed ‘WiFi’ to Wife.  Hope you saw the funny side of this!

All the best

Alan

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